Comments on: Read Write Body Poem #6: Blood

By: wayne

wayne — Fri, 16 Oct 2009 18:04:13 +0000

i really liked that first line…..but it is all a good read..thanks for sharing

By: poetryaboutart

poetryaboutart — Fri, 16 Oct 2009 15:45:16 +0000

I think that opening is really great: “My blood, it tells on me.” It’s the job of the poet to lure the reader from the very first words, and you have done so very effectively. I am sorry to read about your diabetes. It’s courageous to write about a personal infirmity. The great poet Gwendolyn Brooks said that all of us are infirm. Maybe all of us at RWP should write about our infirmities.
–Therese L. Broderick

By: Linda

Linda — Fri, 16 Oct 2009 01:20:29 +0000

The imagery flows like a metaphor for the river carrying all the food. I really enjoyed reading through your poem. It was a feast of words! Thank you for sharing Nicole. =D

By: Cynthia Short

Cynthia Short — Thu, 15 Oct 2009 21:51:59 +0000

Great imagery and descriptive phrase used here…also very interesting subject matter.

By: Mark

Mark — Thu, 15 Oct 2009 16:18:59 +0000

I cannot go into great detail as to why I liked this. Suffice it to say that you snagged me with that opening salvo and pulled me in from there…

By: davidmoolten

davidmoolten — Thu, 15 Oct 2009 16:14:44 +0000

I love that first short statement, “My blood, it tells on me” and how the rest of the poem becomes a torrent of response like the river into which sugar is dumped. There are many terrific metaphors throughout this, but the fundamental irony of diabetes, of sweetness being a contaminant and a poison is pervasive, and you use it very effectively to heighten the other tensions you address, such as between inner self and outward projection, decorum and sincere passion and/or desire, and the pleasures of a life fully lived versus the ascetic denials of one sort or another that might “preserve” it.

By: Paul Oakley

Paul Oakley — Thu, 15 Oct 2009 16:10:22 +0000

From spam to "a cosmoramic display of the jelly donuts"! Very nice, Nicole. Food and sex very compellingly combined.

By: gautami tripathy

gautami tripathy — Thu, 15 Oct 2009 15:06:46 +0000

It is a such a visual piece! exulting mixture

By: anthonynorth

anthonynorth — Thu, 15 Oct 2009 14:14:53 +0000

Some great use of language here. Very visual, too.

By: rallentanda

rallentanda — Thu, 15 Oct 2009 03:30:58 +0000

Wonderful food imagery,great colour and texture.Liked the meataphors..giant plates of inguini,not stopped at the doors of the lips,sugary time bombs,curved erections in the sky,kidnapped Kundalinis and backlit wanton desire. A strident rhythm throughout the poem…good for performance…Loved it.Wild! Especially spiking the punch