Stars fall and
crack
open tonight.
Stars call you
to
wing, to take flight.
Cars follow
you
with high-beam eyes.
Cars swallow
down
your stardust miles.
Mars-hallowed
sky:
red dot, third eye.
Mars, shallow
hung,
at dawn will die.
Jars of light
points
glow in our hearts.
Jars break: light
leaks,
glass falls apart.
Char the flesh:
flames
lick at your feet.
Char the night:
ash
falls past your feet.
Scar our eyes
with
fire tonight.
Scar the night
with
stardust light.
Bizarre flight
ends:
dreams are spoken.
Bizarre night
ends:
dreams crack open.
Written 5/28, 5/29, 5/30, and 5/31/11
© 2011 Nicole Nicholson. All Rights Reserved.
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This was written for this week’s prompt at We Write Poems, which was to write one piku, then choose one or two key words and find rhymes for them, and then slightly re-write the first piku.
Piku, as the prompt explains (courtesy of Tilly Bud) is a haiku-like form, except the number of syllables per line correspond to the first three digits of pi — 3/1/4 respectively.
I wrote mine in such a fashion that all of these strung together could constitute one complete poem in and of itself. Gratitude for inspiration this week goes to Stevie Nicks (“Nightbird“) and Owl City (“Fireflies“).
-Nicole
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Stumble It!
Your pikus are terrific. I love the beginning rhyme even more than the end rhyme. Sadly my brain did not produce piku, so I shall enjoy yours instead.
You put your unique spin to it, Nicole!
Wow! Real poetry in piku. I give you the crown.
I concur! Crown her! Crown her!
Seriously, these work very well in pairs. I love the night/star/fire themes. Almost has a beltane feel (even though we’ve just slipped into June).
Intense imagery in these! Beautiful way of stringing them together and following the prompt. Love how you continue the starry/nighttime theme throughout, and end with that crazy phrase “dreams crack open.” Wow!
Wow, you took the pikus and did great stanza pairs. I like the word variations in your first lines.
Richard
Quite unique and wonderful, Nicole.
Pamela
You did a wonderful job with pikus to tell a story!
so well done Nicole…i couldnt get this form going….thanks for sharing your words
Oh I think these are just grand, Nicole. My favorites were the pikus that began with “chars.”
Excellent construction.
~Brenda
I think you’ve done a brilliant job with the pikus. I love that you have a cohesive and comprehensible poem from them.